Last Updated on February 28, 2023 by factkeeps
“Develop success from failures. Discouragement and failure are two of the surest stepping stones to success.”
― Dale Carnegie
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| 5 Minute Summary of How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie |
How To Win And Influence People is a book which can’t be summarized in a few minutes, this book have very deep meanings. Each quote of this book have the power to change the whole life of any person.
In this post, I am going to provide you a fair summary of this awesome book in my words.
I have 100% believe that this summary will definitely help you to understand this book and motivates you to read complete book and many other books of the great writer Dale Carnegie.
So let’s get started
Part 1st – How To Handle People ?
Handling people is very easy, if you didn’t criticize them on small- small things.
If you appreciate others on their small or big success or achievements.
Don’t find loose points everywhere, find some positivity, stay positive and spread positivity.
Criticism is dangerous.
It puts a person on the defensive and usually makes him strive to justify himself. And it wounds a person’s precious pride, hurts his sense of importance, and arouses resentment.
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| “Don’t criticize what you can’t understand.” ― Bob Dylan |
Criticism on everything will shows you as a negative person, people will think that you have negative approach and you are unsuitable for handling any task.
Anyone can criticize, condemn and complain very easily. But it takes character and self-control to be understanding and forgiving.
Appreciate Others
Always give appreciation to others, whenever you see that they are getting success in their life so appreciate them.
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| “Life is too short to waste your time on people who don’t respect, appreciate, and value you.”― Roy T. Bennett |
Always give honest appreciation
People loves the honest appreciation; honest appreciation makes good relationships it helps you to grow and make trust with others.
Understand the difference between Appreciation and Flattery
Appreciation is a thing which is universally admired and all the people hates flatters.
So, know the difference between flattery and appreciation.
Flattery is cheap and selfish; Flattery is a thing which will give you only harm.
‘I have yet to find the person, however great or exalted his station, who did not do better work and put forth greater effort under a spirit of approval than he would ever do under a spirit of criticism.’ – Charles Schwab
Part 2nd – How To Make People Like You?
Yes, you can make other people like you. Just follow these three rules.
Become genuinely interested in people stop making everything about you.
If you want to make friends, so start giving the time to others.
Be Sincere and care about the others.
Smile More
Smile is a thing which shows your positive attitude.
Keep smiling while meeting with others.
A person with smiling face can win anyone’s heart.
Control Your Thoughts
Happiness comes from the inner conditions, not outward. Always remember
“There is either good or bad but thinking makes it so.’’
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| There is either good or bad but thinking makes it so.’’ |
Your smile will work as messenger of your goodwill.
Remember the name of others and call them from their name in sweet manner
People love their name, so always try to call others by name.
“Remember that name and call it easily, and you have paid a subtle and very effective compliment. But forget it or misspell – it and you have placed yourself at a sharp disadvantage.” – Dale Carnegie
A name is a thing which will make the communication more personal.
Whether you are dealing with a waitress or to a senior executive, use their name and see the magic.
To become a good conversationalist, Become a good listener.
Always ask people questions which will encourage them to talk about themselves.
People are more interested in their wants, problems and desires.
Talk in terms of their interest.
Explain, how you and your service can solve their issues or can benefit them.
Make them feel important – And do this sincerely.
Talk to people about themselves, said Disraeli, one of the shrewdest men who ever ruled the British Empire. Talk to people about themselves and they will listen for hours.
Dale Carnegie
Part 3rd – How To Be A Leader?
How you can change people without giving any offence?
Appreciate Others
As writer already told, people love the appreciation so always appreciate others.
Don’t be a flatter
Don’t tell other’s mistake directly.
Keep your conversations like this –
‘We’re really proud of you, Johnnie, for raising your grades this term, and by continuing the same conscientious efforts next term, your algebra grade can be up with all the others.’ – Dale Carnegie
Ask questions instead of direct orders.
Asking questions makes an order palatable and stimulates the creativity of the person.
Show Respect for Others Opinions.
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| You cannot teach a man anything; you can only help him to find it within himself. – Galileo |
Always show respect for others and their opinions, Yes, your opinion is most matters but as being a good listener, you have to respect others suggestions and opinions.
You cannot teach a man anything; you can only help him to find it within himself. – Galileo
Always admit if you are wrong, there’s positive magic in admitting you could be wrong.
“You will never get into trouble by admitting that you may be wrong. That will stop all argument and inspire your opponent to be just as fair and open and broad-minded as you are. It will make him want to admit that he, too, may be wrong.”
The Yes Psychology
Keep emphasizing. Get the other person saying ‘Yes, yes’. Keep them from saying ‘No.’
The best speaker gets the greater number of ‘Yes’ responses from his audience.
Try to see the things from other persons point of view.
Don’t see everything from own point of view, try to view others point of view.
Always ask yourself: ‘Why should he want to do it?’ This will take time but it will avoid making enemies and will get better results.
Be sympathetic with the others
Start giving sympathy to others and see that they will start loving you.
Make others happy about doing the thing you suggest.
Always make the other person happy about doing the thing you suggest
Be Sincere and Be empathetic.
Always speak sincerely to others your sincerity should show in your actions.
Conclusion
This book is priceless, this book can teach you everything about the life. How you can create better friends and how you can start influencing others.
Summarizing this book in few minutes is not possible, but I tried my best for proving you the real extract of this book to you.
This book can give you a guru mantra on how you get success in your life.
Just be sincere, start appreciating others, start remembering the name of people.
Be a good listener, talk in the interest of others, become genuinely interested in other people.
Kee smiling, stop criticizing, start helping, start conversation, avoid hesitation.
And see the magic that how you will get the growth in your life.
I highly recommend you to go and read this book and implement the principles of this book in your life.
I strongly believe if you implement principles of this book perfectly, you will definitely see the difference.
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I will see you in my next post, till then Good Bye.
